Jennifer Hides Her Face in SHAME as She Blames TWITTER!

Posted on March 27, 2009


Evening Sweeties

I can’t let too much time go by before I have to unleash my thoughts on the latest celebrity news on Jennifer Aniston. She’s the perfect superficial target to poke fun at because there’s abundance of HOT MESS. It’s like being a kid in a candy store. Let us get to the gobbstopping goey gumdrops of it all.

When the “news” of the split between Maniston and Mayer first hit the press I initially thought it was a waste of time to  clicky clack my fingers on the keyboard because I thought everyone had to be on the same page that  this “relationship” was the biggest crock of you know what!  It’s a lot  like the Michael Jackson and Lisa Marie “relationship”. Remember he went as far as to put her in the  video “You Are Not Alone ” and the gross fake kiss at the MTV awards?

vma1994-mj-lisa-kissI’m overcome by a bit of nausea 

The Maniston/Mayer relationship cried the same stank air of  “desperate publicity stunt” that  the MJ and LMP debacle did years before.

300mayeranistonlc022409pictures speak 1,000 words!

This picture whispers “Jenn my payment for tonight hasn’t cleared yet! WTF?”

Except Maniston and Mayer were not as shocking and scary to look at  as MJ and LMP.

In my opinion if you’re going to manufacture a relationship AT LEAST go out with a bang and have your agent hook you up with someone that is going to bring the pain or at least give the public something juicy.  Might as well make a good story! 

No wonder why Maniston is hiding under her hoodie  from the press!


 What’s the deal? I thought she took every opportunity to grab the mic and get in front of the camera?


I have a feeling Ms. Aniston is hiding out over the sheer embarrassment that the press is reporting that she ended the “relationship” with John Mayer over his Twitter obsession!

Wait… I have to take 5 to laugh HYSTERICALLY once again!

laughing-fem-emoticonoooohh… wiping the tears from the corners of my eyes!!!!

This is hysterical on  many levels. To give the press “twitter” as the reason for breaking off your fake relationship is so unbelievably lame and ever so boring. You could site any reason in the world and TWITTER is what your publicity team chose to put out there???

 Twitter is an addictive social network. I use it constantly! I think it RULES and quite frankly I believe it will trump Facebook in a few months as being the largest and best social networking site! John Mayer does Twitter like no body’s business. If you check out his twitter wall he is glued to it. There are plenty of people (celebrity and non-celebrity )who Twitter throughout the day and are maintain their relationships.

Ashton Kutcher is Twitterific! Ashton twitters like it is going out of style! He was doing so much that a few months ago his wifey Demi Moore opened an account and joined him! I follow both of them on Twitter and they are in love with each other and clearly in love with Twitter.

59thberlinfilmfestivalhappytearspremiere0nkvxapdncflTWITTER LOVE

The point here is this:  if there was an iota of love or even LIKE between Mayer and Aniston they could have found a way to deal with John’s excessive Twittering!

Tsk. Tsk. Tsk. How are you going to blame the  Twitter bird for the fact you get NO love Jenn?

twitter-birdIt’s not my fault!

People who claim to be “friends” of Maniston (aka: people on her payroll) supposedly leaked to the press that 


 “John suddenly stopped calling her or returning her emails and when she would finally catch up with him, he’d say: ‘I’ve been so busy with work. I’m sorry I haven’t had time to call you back.”

The source added: “Jen was fuming. There he was, telling her he didn’t have time for her and yet his page was filled with Twitter updates.

“Every few hours, sometimes minutes, he’d update with some stupid line. And in her mind, she was like ‘He has time for all this Twittering, but he can’t send me a text, an email, make a call?’.”

It has also been claimed that John made no attempt to cover up his Tweets from Jen. That’s an easy one  to figure out. I’m sure hiding his Tweets was not apart of the original financial arrangement between the two of them. Of course he didn’t care. I’m sure even with the handsome reward he received for being an “Oscars boyfriend” his friends were making fun of him and  he was TIRED  of it.

I don’t know Mayer from a can of paint. I think he’s got great guitar skills but as far as being some deep and introspective guy, I am not so sure. He seems to be more along the line of  “young, dumb, and full of you know what”! He has been tweeting a lot lately about country music hottie of the month Taylor Swift. I’m sure that Swift is more Mayer’s cup of coffee!

taylor_swift2Swift is more Mayer’s cup of joe= light and sweet.

unlike Maniston=straight up with no sugar

What would Mayer want with Jennifer’s mannishness when there are younger ladies with real TALENT in the sea? Taylor Swift has been writing songs since she was a tyke and is the hottest thing in country music right now. She didn’t get her start because her Dad was a famous soap star. She is where she is because of her talent and drive. That is something Maniston knows NOTHING about! Everything Jennifer has was handed to her on silver platter. She might have millions but I am sure it makes her to be one uninteresting, unoriginal , and talentless lady!

Everyone knows it is far more intriguing to have a success story! A story of climbing your way to the top!

Unlike the True Hollywood Story of Aniston which includes getting everything handed down to her from Daddy Dearest.

jennifer-aniston-dad-john-aniston“Daddy… I want to be a movie star!! RIGHT NOW!!! gimmee.. gimmee” 

I wonder who is next on Jen’s “boyfriend” payroll? Whoever it is will be a little richer and will guarantee the public a good laugh. Looking forward to it!


More sweet treats soon!!!

Night Night

follow me on Twitter: